I do have something to offer you, my soul's mysteries. Will you dare to discover?

Death

I kneel before the sacred land,
To end the life I lived,
To walk endless days in the sand,
To resign of the evil I believed.

I opened my eyes,
Gave myself to your judgement,
Now, as the sky cries
Allow me to present my atonement.

"I have passed the boat and found myself in shore, looking at her eyes and..."

Beauty, peace, a longing over in a moment,
Burning love in Her face,
To my soul's content,
Finding myself here, in Summerland, safe.

If there's a word I crave,
Something I work for,
To conserve through years through windows and frames,
Is Her ethereal, eternal and unconditional love.

Background, life and purgatory

Sitting naked by the edge of the fog, hearing the soft music that the waves bring, waiting the news from a son who loves his mother and his motherland, who gave up is nature and pride for the warmth that only a mother can bring. Loneliness for my present life and despair for the fear that my memory brings of the life that I struggle to past, I'm watching this fog in hope of a better future.
A free spirit shines through the dark of my mind. Some kind of beauty that has the ability to conquer even the most flawed of humans. I walk this dark tunnels in her presence, unable to feel her warmth but happy to kill the loneliness. From the beginning to the end, this pleasure comes with the sweat and blood of this disfigured demon. And the shadows remain, the wind blows with rage and brings the rain. I walk all this miles to continue through the boat to the safety of Her shores. Mother, give me shelter from my sins and my fears.
My intent leads me to Your door. I sit and wait judgement upon my soul as I pledge for my safety from the world of embers that wants to devour me into it's ignorance. I feel I'm falling, failing to secure the entrance to eternal rest. Hands to the sky, knees sinking between rocks and finding water. Kissing the rain and crying, I scream in pure despair and innocence, let me find a new life, let me carry on, give me shelter from myself.

A blessed beginning

Anxiously crying, why am I yearning, in this year of apathy, a new word leaves a question mark in the air for those who have departed to Summerland

As if in a fog, I struggle to compensate the time lost...

What's it to you?

I could pretend I care but I really don't... what's it to you?

By the shore

Somewhere I believe, a home made of joy and warmth. I exist through that hope, at the gates of the river that greets me with it's natural beauty and coldness in the morning. In shallow existence, I ignore my shadow and welcome the rain in a night of silent solitude and longing. I've missed my evil and mischief, my destruction and anger. Taken for granted, this child stepped out of home into the pouring rain to recover what it was once lost.
Under the Moon light, a blessed chant drove me here. Conquered my soul and mind, controlled my body and created and rapture between my fatigue and my objective. And now I leave this world in a quiet bleeding to an immortal life in the shadows of their minds. My room is small and the light dim but nowhere I rather be but by the shore watching the waves turn around my perspective and the sound of breaking water tearing apart the innocence along with the screams of my progenitors.
Breaking the barriers, discovering the reason of this existence, as I paint my picture with the blood of my ancestors whom lie lifeless in the floor. I found a secret, hush and listen to the wind, it guides me away. Awaiting the adrenaline to kick in, I rush outside and discover delight in the fire that burns my body. In the end of my life, in the final destination of my journey I kneel before the sea and thank the stars for the life I once had. I find my conscience both torturing and a blessing. I give in to the pain and launch myself to the waves. A merciless death for a loveless life by the shore.

"A infelicidade vai sempre ao encontro de quem a espera." - Livro Brisingr, página 170, autor Christopher Paolini

Through the window

A sad ending conquers the soul. And it's time to cry again as the rains pours outside. You look through the window in confusion but all you can see is the ghost of what your life used to be. That is why I choose to live with my window open...

Re: Vai na volta

Incrível o que consigo encontrar aqui,
Num espaço perto de mim,
Preso dentro de um barracão,
Com uma janela perdida, em pleno Verão.

Encontro a divagação de um ser que nunca cresceu,
De um sonho que já abraçou e que já temeu,
Perdido nas suas brincadeiras infantis,
Lembrando-se de quando era feliz.

Catastrófica vontade de desistir,
Percorrer o mundo e mentir sobre fugir,
Sendo esta nem a última nem a primeira ocasião
Que este rapaz se perde e se refugia no seu mundo de fantasia.

Creio não poder solucionar nem remediar
Esta situação degradante que se continua a desenrolar,
Na mente do jovem que criança já não o é
Mas um adulto crescido que mal se aguenta sozinho de pé.

A imagem partida

Ela caminha pela escuridão, as ruas perseguem a sua escuridão, as sombras retraem-se sobre seus passos e os candeeiros da rua apagam-se em medo. As suas veias carregam o fardo do morto no parto, as suas lágrimas formam-se em diamantes que se encontram com a terra e despedaçam a sua derradeira esperança de viver. O desespero que brilha nos seus olhos, o vazio que comanda as suas acções, tantas são as barreiras que procuro derrubar para conseguir ao seu coração chegar e a fortaleza da sua alma partida conquistar. Ela ruma directamente ao rio onde procura acabar com o seu sofrimento. Corro, cego, para chegar a tempo de agarrar a sua doce mão e para fazer-la revelar um sorriso.
A sua alma brilha e rouba-me o discernimento quando o seu sorriso lhe preenche a face, sem falsas intenções, nada a esconder. A sua tristeza é uma nuvem escura sobre o meu dia, pudesse eu evaporar-lhe o choro nocturno e apagar-lhe os pesadelos que lhe surgem e ressuscitam os medos mais infinitos e profundos que qualquer felicidade trazida por memórias de infância. Desconheço seu passado e desconheço a cor da sua alma, ela esconde as cicatrizes que trás consigo noite após noite em que nos encontramos. Traz o luar, as ondas altas e baixas, descrevem-me o seu estado de espírito. Tento o consolo entre os meus braços, na minha futilidade e vergonha, escondo a minha face entre seus cabelos e deixo a minha alma ser levada para um misto acinzentado de felicidade e frustração.
Descrevo círculos infindáveis nesta terra, escrevo na areia a sua história, os seus temores e felicidades, memórias defuntas levadas pela maré para longe. Largo o seu véu e o seu feitiço nesta jangada que lanço ao mar, juntamente com uma vela a arder e as minhas lágrimas. Tributo por um coração que deixou de bater, que abandonou outro que batia por ele. O seu sangue estagnou nas minhas memórias e agora agarro-me com mais força aos lençóis andas de nadar para o horizonte a seu encontro. A sua imagem a arder e permanecer sobre o reflexo da Lua.

Key7

To achieve success, one must fail countless times...

Sex, alcohol and Rock n' Roll

A vida é

A vida é um caminho de ferro com vários e longos túneis escuros, atravessando montanhas e vales desconhecidos.
A vida é uma guerra perdida onde se tem de desfrutar cada momento de vitória nas várias batalhas que vão existindo.
A vida é um carrossel, com os seus altos e baixos, sons esquisitos, várias luzes, por vezes mais rápido, por vezes mais lento mas sempre com o mesmo destino.
A vida é a nossa própria alma posta à prova por um tribunal invisível, por olhos gigantes e imaginários a que chamamos de Deus (nalguns casos, como o meu, Deusa), a partir de filosofias e debates da consciência. O que fazemos durante a vida é que decide o próximo passo a dar durante a mesma, não vale é desistir por mais longos que sejam aqueles túneis escuros, por mais sangrentas que sejam aquelas batalhas, por mais extensa que seja a descida. Nós decidimos a nossa vida, nós é que controlamos o nosso destino, se formos fortes o suficiente para o agarrar-mos...

Don't Speak - Sarah Menescal

"Don't Speak - Sarah Menescal", cover da original "Don't Speak - No Doubt". Prefiro a voz desta jovem.

The uprising stalls and gives space to people's will

The night was of abundance,
The king laughed and danced in ignorance,
The betrayal came in hand
As the crown was taken from his head.

Darkness covered the kingdom and people lived in fear,
His hopes and passions were thrown to the sea
With the death of their sovereign and their brother
Came to rule that bloodthirsty and angry child, a soul's and heart's robber.

Withered from love,
Ignoring the flight of the white dove,
The symbol of freedom and peace in this kingdom's flag,
Now as significant as the dirty that the river drags.

Free of individual will,
This kingdom's people go for the kill,
Of the born with malice that no one could save,
That malice took him to the grave.

And in the early morning
There was no mourning,
Evil was banished from this land
And the the castle was condemn by the betrayal to be derelict and turned to sand.

King's Sad Departure, Prince Uprising

A king's sad departure as he leaves the gates of his castle with the soldiers to conquer freedom to his son and future generations. A just king shows that this life is more than the two sides of the tape. Kept down inside, quiet and vicious, the fear of dying, to never see the green pastures again. But greater is the courage that allows the sword to move against the enemy's body in a bloody battle. So he rides on, to unknown fates, heaving a sad goodbye every time that he has to leave. As now this is castle is now derelict, his son is left to wonder how to grow alone.
With a task a hand and a pain in his chest, the heir of the throne is left deserted in his empty room, cold nothern mornings punish his tears left to mourn the king of the lands and his heart. A son that never knew his fathers love through his gaze, only for his actions. His heart filled with anger and sadness, the kindness that his father brought upon the land was now as much as a ghost as he was when walking out of castle. Unemotional prince, to conquer what darkness has forgotten in those remote lands, behind the hills and over the clouds. As the Moon dictates the night sky, show us the perverse side of the throne.
And he walks, youthful but fool. Thinking he his superior to the people, that his kingdom would be nothing without him but that he would be everything without those filthy people, feeding of his kindness. Innocence torn apart but his father's departure, he could bear the weight of the loss and lost perspective of the justice that the past king had brought to this country. The peace that once was inside of the walls wasn't to last. The dagger moved towards the injustice at his hand and he, innocent by his ignorance, knew of nothing. The tides move at night and the uprising stalls and gives space to people's will.

Prelude

I will leave this place,
All this is falling and I am failing,
In this cursed palace,
Know our children's blessing.

A king's sad goodbye letter...

Four amulets

Round and round it goes, the colourful Universe decides our fate and so on.
The Moon controls the ties and murders all of us brave enough to go sail to the horizon.
Th Sun burns my skin and I'm still here, apathetic to the bone.
And the shadows remain my only friends, trapping me in my life.

God-To-Be

So begins the hunt...
The look of God from below, roaming endlessly the seven seas, exploring the vast blue skies, scavenging through green madows and grey mountains. I looked the world for answers, for who I am, who I'm destined to be. More than a blasphemy, more than a body and a mind, a genetic part of another human. I find my tears the same as rain drops, my joy the same as a Summer breeze, my sorrow as a Winter night and my birth as the coming of the Fall. The Spring inspires me to rebel, against myself and all I know. Gives the free will and the will to run thought the explored meadows. But I am fearful. Fearful that I contain no joy or sorrow, that it is all artificial or temporary. I stopped seeing things as fair and unfair a long time ago. I stopped taking sides. So I won't fear more of the rain or the wind. I will fear for myself, one day, one black Winter day, when I am lonely and try to escape that feeling of emptiness.
This world is empty. Now I find myself wondering if I let everyone down and they have fled to another planet. Was this not enough, did I not give it all? I walk, ever seeming to be tired. The day passes by, the Sun shines only for me, the Moon weeps me a serenade. I seem more lonely than ever yet I find no reason to cry. The world is beautiful, no concrete, no tall buildings preventing the Sun from shinning, only huge meadows, green lands that belong to no hands of greed. And I roam on to the fury of the seas, it all is justified by all the negative energies that were let go before the world was re-built. Re-built. But by who? To who? To me? I'm the only one here, does that mean that I was the creator? Or am I the objective of the creation? Doesn't matter right now, redundancy and weakness surrounds those questions. I move along under the blackened skies, clouds filled with rain. I don't feel myself crying yet there are water drops falling from my eyes. I find myself to be lost with no horizon in front of my eyes. Yet I do not fear, I feel myself all and going to my source.
Satisfied with all this, I approach a strange land. Desert as the rest of the planet is. I contemplate upon this in front of me. It is quite a vision, an exotic island with new plants, new animals, new reasons to be. I'm alone with animals yet that makes me happy and calm. The vast silence conquers my soul and I come upon an epitaph. I will name this Earth and leave it. This is the age of the animals, they will do a better job than humans. Illudo, I rejoyce upon my creation and go to the deep seas, off to explore the deepest blues and find new life there. Ilujya, you are the new God of this earth, rule well mighty and wise wolf-God.

Blurred sight under a morning sky

As Death whispered a sigh and time passed by