I could get lost in her eyes. A thousand times or more, forever in this desperate circle. But she seems so distant, sad with diamond eyes that close her soul within, protecting her from any harm. I tried to reach her, to grab her hand and take her far away. We walked and walked, got lost in the streets. We laugh, cried, shed every drop of rain left in us but we were unable to light the fire, to establish a connection. What we missed, I don't know. But I still feel more lost without her, alone, helpless. I want to know, can she tell me, is the silence enough? Or is our surface all that we can show each other? Strong hearts with scars and chains from the past that never seem to go away. And the more I think about it, the more baffled I get. Her smile fills what her touch lacks, her beauty is the white to the black that my thoughts are. But I can't tell if I'm chasing a ghost, something that wasn't meant to be.
So much left to be said but this time I'll spend thinking of her smile, the melody in her voice and trying to understand why I couldn't think around her, why I needed so desperately to have her there, beside me. Continuing to fade in this spiral, the only truth that I still find is how wished her to touch me, to be with me. And this silence that seems so dear to me, uplifting this hole that I find inside, left by her, has now become an enemy. Crushing me, taking me to fields of longing that I always wrote but so rarely felt.
I can't predict what the future will bring, can't read her mind to know if she wants to see me again. I get nervous at the thought of seeing her again, I get weak wondering if she thinks of me at all. And I'm too afraid to ask and get dismissed to the streets again. I don't recall feeling this. So much to be said and yet I wonder, is there any chemistry between us?